For unto us

I’ve been tearing up a lot in recent years. It doesn’t take much. Videos about dogs on the internet. A song at church. A photograph from long ago. A bit of good news. It’s that last one that both baffles me and thrills me. When I hear of good things happening, particularly from someone I love or care about, I begin scanning the room for tissues. The news that always triggers my tears begins “For unto us a child is born . . .”

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The introduction of something new is an exciting time. Whether it is the birth of a child or the start of a new job or the opportunity to face a new year, hope springs from the promise of something new and different.

For some of us, the promise of “new” feels remote. Yet, eternal hope and deliverance is close by. We only have to reach out and touch the child. “New” is available to us all.

“For unto us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders.  And He will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”  — Isaiah 9:6-7

Pass the tissues, please.

 

‘Tis the Season to Forget

Most of us can remember a Christmas or a Thanksgiving or a Hanukkah or even a 4th of July long ago that is forever anchored in our mind as the best holiday ever. The right people were there. The conditions were perfect. The right gifts and foods and words were shared.

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Those are the memories that bring us to a warm and happy place as we anticipate the holidays ahead.

Unfortunately, for many people, those happy thoughts are violently derailed by intervening events that fracture our anticipation and instill dread in place of joy. The death of a loved one. The serious illness of a friend. Divorce. Financial reversals. Relocation to a new city. Conflict between and among family and friends.

Tragically, for those who face these challenges, the blessed memories stand no chance against the fear we have that we will never be able to recapture the same warmth and happiness. As a result, we try to forget. And worse, we become resolved not to attempt to make new, happy memories. After all, those sacred moments might suffer the fate of the earlier ones. There is simply too much heartbreak at stake to try again.

What we must do this season is forget.

Not the good times, of course. Nor even the bad times, necessarily. Instead we must forget — even if it’s just for a moment — ourselves. For when we really analyze those old, wonderful memories, they are bound tightly to those people who surrounded us and who made them so good.

More importantly, we must remember that it is our presence — our smiles, our laughter, and sometimes even our tears — that make warm memories for others. And in doing that, we celebrate these holidays, these holy days, as honored guests of our King and our Creator.

May you enjoy wonderful holiday memories — both old and new!

Timely Procrastination

Do you suffer from procrastination? Have you ever had something you really needed to do, but you just couldn’t bring yourself to do it? Maybe you’re like me and have a whole list of these tenacious to-dos. What if I told you that I’ve discovered a sure-fire method to conquer these worry-mongers — efficiently and painlessly?

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Well, I have two methods for you. The first is the answer to the procrastination problem you’ve heard dozens and dozens of times, but have routinely refused to pursue.  Simply do it.

Now, I know you’re a little upset with me because you wanted something new and exciting — like a new app for your smartphone — that would take each lingering item and line it up for elimination. And, because I have so much experience in this area, I think you probably would also like for this magical solution to include a premium-feature that would take care of these items without you actually having to do anything.

That’s not going to happen.

However, I can give you one more little tip that works every time I use it. Here it is:

Schedule 15 minutes to do something — anything — about the task you are putting off.

Schedule 15 minutes to do something — anything — about it.

Setting a time for your “procrastinable” allows you to set it aside and reduce your anxiety. Simply marking your calendar makes you feel better about yourself and this long-awaited activity.

Even if the item will take you an hour, set aside 15 minutes and show-up for that appointment with yourself. Several important processes will be set in motion.

  • In the moment, you’ll feel relief that you are finally doing something.
  • Forcing yourself to address the challenge allows you to truly assess what needs to be done.
  • Sometimes the effort required to do the task will allow you to decide whether this thing should be done by you — or at all.
  • Often, when we start working on things, the anticipation of fulfillment may push us through to completion. We find that we had more than 15 minutes, after all.

15 minutes. If it’s not worth 15 minutes, then maybe it really shouldn’t be on your list.

Procrastination isn’t a character problem. It’s a priority problem. Whatever is on your list, big or small, just set aside a little time to see what you can do.

The Better Understanding Project

On this #GivingTuesday, I hope that you will find a way to become involved with a good work in your community or in your larger world. And, I would love for your involvement to be with us in our work at the Duncum Center for Conflict Resolution.

Blessings on your day!